Saturday, 26 February 2011

What is REAL?

Photo by Marco Ficili
I have organised a fair few weddings and it is so hard to decide which one moved me the most. Was it the wedding in the secret garden where the bride wore her great grandmothers wedding dress or the wedding where the groom could not stop crying (mentioning no names!)...
I think the wedding's that have moved me the most are the ones that have been personalised. The weddings where the couple have written their own vows or a guest sang a traditional Irish wedding song, or the readings were particularly moving. 

I get asked a lot about my personal favourite wedding reading is, instantly The Velveteen Rabbit comes to my mind...

Extract from 'The Velveteen Rabbit'
Margery Williams (1881-1944)

‘What is REAL?’ asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. ‘Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?’ ‘Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you. When someone loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’ ‘Does it hurt? Asked the Rabbit. ‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’ ‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’ It doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.’ ‘I suppose you are real?’ said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse only smiled. ‘Someone made me Real,’ he said. ‘That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.’

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